Wait, we spend how much time masturbating at work?

It’s no surprise that during the pandemic we all got rather comfortable with working from home.

The boundaries blurred and with no draining morning commute, we all had a little more pent up energy to expend. So, we masturbated.

In fact, a study of 18 to 32-year-old UK adults found that 30% reported an increase in solo sexual practices.

And now, we seem to have continued this ‘not safe for work’ habit since returning to the office.

It turns out that 7.4 million workers in the UK have masturbated on company time.

Now masturbating is by no means a bad thing. It’s healthy for you to get to know your body, but doing it at work where a zoom call could pop up any minute or a meeting is just around the corner seems bold.

It’s men that are more likely to take their frustrations into their own hands (pun intended) and masturbate during the work day, according to the research by Chemist4U.

And interestingly, the higher earners on salaries of £35k to £45k were more inclined to get themselves to the finish line.

Work self-pleasure was most popular among the 25 to 34-year-olds, with married people doing it a lot more than singles. Three times per week more than those who aren’t in a relationship, to be exact.

Singles masturbated once a week on average at work, but not only did married Brits masturbate more, they masturbated for longer too.

A married person’s self-pleasure session lasts a whopping 38 minutes on average.

But this costs companies a pretty penny – an estimated £154 million per week.

But while it may be costing your boss money, it’s having a positive effect on Britain’s w*nking workers.

About 33% claimed a work masturbation session helped relieve stress while 24% claimed their overall mood was better.

Nearly 20% said it also helped boost their concentration – that’s after they’ve spent more than half an hour away from their desk, of course.

James O’Loan, pharmacist and CEO of Chemist4U said: ‘While we don’t condone people masturbating while they’re being paid to work, many of the 7.4 million Brits that have admitted to doing so have shared positive outcomes to pleasuring while on the clock.

‘This comes as no surprise given the fact that there are many surprising health benefits of orgasms.

‘Your brain releases oxytocin when having an orgasm, which helps the body to relax by lowering your blood pressure and your cortisol levels.’

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