My son texted me out of the blue to tell me he has a child in Australia

DEAR DEIDRE: MY son texted me out of the blue to tell me I’d become a grandmother.

I was devastated because my grandchild was born a year and a half ago. My son’s mildly autistic and after missing out a lot due to bullying, he decided to travel to Australia.

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He’s 26 and met a girl there. But when the relationship failed he returned to the UK. After his ex begged him, he returned for what he thought would be a final visit.

When he came back to the UK for the second time, his ex told him she was pregnant and planned to keep the baby.

My son couldn’t get back for the birth because of the pandemic. He kept all this from me. I know he’s an adult and must face the consequences, but I am concerned for his future.

I’m 56. It feels like a bad dream that won’t end. There’s a little girl on the other side of the world that I feel nothing for.

DEIDRE SAYS: You must be reeling but try to remember that your granddaughter is innocent in all this.

Your son needs your support now, so tell him you love him and you’ll always be there for him.

Think about reaching out to your granddaughter’s mother so you can build some kind of relationship with the little girl.

You can encourage your son to step up in a positive way by taking an interest in this child yourself. For help and support, contact familylives.org.uk, 0808 800 2222).

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