Just Jane: ‘Boss might sack me if I say no to sex’

Today however, we’re very different people. I’m in a relationship with a lovely girl and she’s married to a much younger man. 

Everyone laughs at him behind her back because he’s basically her handbag carrier and she treats him like a lap dog. 

But my relationship is real. I genuinely love my partner and don’t want to have an affair. 

But I fear that giving in to my new boss may be the only way of saving my job. In recent months I’ve taken out the lease on an expensive flat and bought a car. 

I’m heavily in debt. My boss knows this and I suspect she’s out to take advantage of me. 

She’s a very attractive, strong woman and I could go far by hanging onto her coat-tails, but I do have my pride and morals. 

The other evening she got me into her office and snogged my face off. Then she suggested sex on her leather couch. 

I pretended that she was joking and made a dash for it. 

But I know full well that she never jokes and that if she wants me in her bed then I’m as good as toast. What can I do? 

JANE SAYS: Your arrogant boss thinks she can click her fingers and get anything she wants, but she can’t presume to own you. 

You two share a sexual history, but you were both single back then. 

A lot has changed in the meantime – especially what is deemed appropriate behaviour in the workplace. 

If she genuinely thinks that it’s acceptable, in 2019, to coerce you into regular sex, then she is stuck in the dark ages. 

Know your own worth and start having confidence in yourself. Remember you’re in that job through merit and hard work. Don’t allow her to grind you down. 

Make it clear you’re in a happy, committed relationship and have no interest in turning back the clock. 

Make a note of everything that has happened so far and don’t be shy about going to your Human Resources department if she makes you feel uncomfortable. 

Remember that you can always contact ACAS (0300 123 1150) if you don’t feel that your concerns are being taken seriously by your firm. 

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