I was abused as a child and nightmares ruin any time I spend with my young son

DEAR DEIDRE: I CAN’T enjoy being a dad to my little boy. I’m petrified something will happen to him, after I was sexually assaulted aged seven by a so-called family friend.

I didn’t understand what was happening. I listened to my abuser and told nobody.

As I got older and understood what he’d done, I felt humiliated, disgusted and embarrassed. I began self-harming and drinking heavily.

I’m now 29 and my wife is 27. She gave birth to our son a year ago.

He is the apple of my eye but I have these ­horrific nightmares where I can’t protect him because I couldn’t protect myself.

Earlier this year I tried to end my life, as I can’t go on with these thoughts.

DEIDRE SAYS: Having a child yourself often makes memories of childhood abuse surface, even after many years. But keep remembering that what happened to you was in no way your fault.

Please talk to Napac – the National Association For People Abused In Childhood (napac.org.uk, 0808 801 0331).

It’s important for your little boy’s sake.

My e-leaflet Abused As A Child? can help too.

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