I ditched daily romps for a two-week sex fast – I was so horny even eating Coco Pops became a turn on | The Sun
06/26/2022NEWLEYWEDS Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker recently went on a sex fast for two weeks, saying it gave their love life a boost.
Could once-a-day couple Polly Harrison, 26, a writer from Shrewsbury, and her fiancé Tom, 28, a wine merchant, do the same?
Tom and I met in September 2018 the way most modern couples do nowadays, on Tinder. It developed slowly, but within nine months or so, we were serious about one another and started sleeping together.
Since then, it’s fair to say we’ve enjoyed an active and satisfying sex life. It’s not unheard of for us to do it every day, sometimes multiple times, if the mood takes us.
We have sex in different rooms of the house and have a box of toys to keep things interesting.
Of course, there are other things we value in our relationship, like spending quality time together and really clear communication. But for us, a good love life is important to help us bond and feel closer as a couple.
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Tom proposed in March 2021, and six months ago we bought our first home together. Life is good, the sex is still great – so why on earth, when I read about the new Mr and Mrs Kardashian Barker undertaking a “sex fast” as part of a wider cleanse, did I think we should give it a try?
The truth is, the idea intrigued me. I did some research and read that one of the best things you can do for your sex life is to not orgasm for two weeks, enhancing the pleasure by abstinence.
It’s clear from Kourtney and Travis’ sexual chemistry and endless PDAs that their recent fast has only turned up their sexual dial and cemented their bond. And as we, too, will soon embark on married life, surely it’s a good thing to be as strong a couple as we can, both between and out of the sheets?
When I first raised the idea, Tom was apprehensive. He wasn’t against it, he was just confused as to why I wanted to give it a go.
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3It took a bit of convincing, but once he had all the facts, he was just as intrigued as I was about the potential benefits of the celibacy challenge.
So the metaphorical chastity belt is being buckled, and for two weeks we’re throwing away the key. This can only end well… I hope.
Day One
We had one last hoorah last night before we went to sleep, but you can cut the sexual tension in our house with a knife today.
It’s not necessarily the “not having sex” that’s the issue. We’ve gone without sex for days before, but that happened naturally – neither of us were in the mood, it was a busy time or one of us had gone away without the other. Now we feel like we can’t go near each other, just in case we slip up and start snogging.
Who knew watching someone eat Coco Pops could be a turn-on? Even a lingering kiss goodbye before heading to work feels too sexually charged and risky, so it’s a peck on the cheek for Tom instead.
Day Four
We’ve had to put a ban on any touching, because it’s almost become a challenge – a game of who can be just suggestive enough to make the other one so horny they want to break the fast. So no holding hands, no bottom patting and no physical contact in bed.
I’m determined I won’t give in, even though I am feeling slightly on edge after four days of no sex. I have a lot of pent-up energy I’d love to release, but it’s amusing me trying to make Tom be the one who throws the towel in and begs me for it. Eating a banana in a slightly suggestive manner is a low blow though, I’ll admit!
I worried we’d be moody and snappy with one another as the days passed by with no sex, but things are good between us and we feel incredibly rested, as we’re getting more sleep than normal with no bedtime Olympics.
Day Eight
Hotel sex is one of our great pleasures as a couple. I don’t know what it is about doing it in a different bed, but when we go away we pack in as much nooky as possible.
So it was probably a bad idea to go on a mini break to Cardiff at this point.
No sex definitely puts a bit of a dampener on the weekend. Instead of coming in after a few too many drinks at the hotel bar and heading to the shower together for some soapy fun, we collapse on the bed and go straight to sleep. We still have a lovely time, shopping and scoffing cake, but it’s less exciting than usual.
There are no loopholes with this challenge, and masturbation is definitely off the table. It’s not something I really do – there’s usually no need – but it has crossed my mind this week, I confess.
Day 12
With just two days to go until our sex fast ends, I thought I’d be absolutely gagging for it by now, but in fact, I’ve noticed I’ve started to become less interested in having sex. Tidying the house today, I find our stash of sex toys, and instead of feeling a pang of lust, I feel nothing – not even the slightest of flutters.
Tom is the same, we’ve become sexless beings with very little interest in doing the act. The tension from the beginning of the fast has completely gone and we seem to have settled into our sedentary life of temporary celibacy.
But I feel just as close to Tom. I’m enjoying lying in bed chatting and giggling until the wee hours, even if we’re not physically touching. We’ve always been great at communication, but during this time I feel we’ve both made a lot more effort to be even more vocal about feelings and affection.
Day 14
It’s over! Scrap my previous diary entry about losing our mojo, because this morning we jump on each other and it’s great!
In a weird way, having sex for the first time after two weeks, especially when you usually do it every day, is like coming home to put your slippers on – comforting.
In that sense, our fast ended on a bit of an anti-climax (albeit we both definitely climaxed – sorry, neighbours!), but I feel proud we stuck to it.
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It hasn’t put any emotional distance between us and we’ve learned that, even without the physical side of our relationship, our love and bond is strong.
We’ve realised that sex isn’t the be all and end all of our relationship – but we certainly won’t be trying celibacy again any time soon.
TOM SAYS…
"When Polly first raised the idea of a sex fast, I admit I was curious. Apparently it has a lot of benefits, so I was up for the challenge.
"We definitely struggled the first few days, but after a while we started to make light of our unmet desires.
"Weirdly, towards the end of the challenge, like Polly, I started to actually lose interest in sex.
"It was almost as though the less we had, the less I thought about it. Don’t get me wrong, I’m very glad it’s over now and I certainly won’t be trying it again.
"Our sex life is great just as it is.”
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