The Cambridges’ wood-intensive 2020 Christmas card conveniently leaked online

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge’s Christmas card “leaked” over the weekend. This is apparently the card they sent out to charities and friends, I suppose. My guess is that we’ll still probably get a new photo of the family, Christmas-portrait-style, closer to the actual holiday. But this leak suits them fine – they’re still trying to change the subject away from all of their recent f–kups, from their Covid Choo-Choo Tour to their masklessness at the Panto Performance. I mean, this is what they wanted: all eyes on them, no competition, just the Future King and Future Queen. And this is how they behave. YIKES!

Anyway, I saw people spin conspiracies about the photo used for the Christmas card but I don’t see any of that (it wasn’t massively Photoshopped, just lightly touched up). I’m more concerned about Kate’s “country girl” cosplay, which has been a constant theme throughout her married life. When she was just William’s girlfriend, she lived in London and shopped and had city fun. But as soon as she became a duchess, suddenly her life was something out of a Jane Austen novel: she was just a local beauty in Bucklebury, a simple country girl who wanted to raise her kids out in the countryside, on a humble 2000-acre estate. So there we have – Kate and her kids in front of a wall of logs. I don’t really get it, nor do I find it very Christmas-y. It’s autumnal, not wintery.

One of my least favorite journalism genres is the “body language expert analyzes royal photos or royal events.” The Daily Mail and the Sun love that sh-t though, and most of the time I feel like the body language expert is just some editor pushing a ridiculous narrative anyway. So if you care, there are pieces already out, analyzing the Cambridges’ body language. They are just kids, please don’t do this.

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

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